Wednesday, November 22nd, 2006
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6:22 am - What Happened to My Game?
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Dag yo.
current mood:  the pc is yo mama
current music: your mom's landing strip
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(comment on this)
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Wednesday, October 4th, 2006
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10:46 pm - I Looooooooooooooooove Dart Manipulation
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Graphic Bodice. More like Traffic Bovine.
current mood:  queasy
current music: What Katie Did - Babyshambles
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(comment on this)
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Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
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6:59 pm - Life is like a hurricane, here in Duckburg
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I can already tell it's gonna be a rough semester.
current mood:  tired and cranky/tranky
current music: (Another Song) All Over Again - JT
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(comment on this)
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Monday, September 4th, 2006
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2:54 am - For a Good Time Call Denise
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I had some really awesome dreams last night-
Dream No 1:
I was in Iraq, for whatever reason, and the war or whatever was going very poorly. So poorly in fact that all Americans (i.e. white people) needed to get out of Iraq asap. But there were only so many ways to leave the country, one of them being in the back of Mountain Dew trunks. Coincidentally the only thing the Iraqi people hate more than Americans is Mountain Dew.
Dream No 2:
Ashley, Katie and I were gonna go to breakfast, while we're waiting to go Jason Hammer shows up in my room and alls I can think about is getting him on the roof to make out, so I tell him he should go to breakfast with us. Then Ashley decides we need to meet her brother too, and for some reason sends Hammer to this place called Baramundies (I remember this because it's the name of a fish from Australia) and we go someplace else to MAYBE meet her brother and his very large black female gymnast troup. I'm angry because I want to be around Hammer, but of course don't say anything. So Katie, Ashley and I sit down at some place that kind of looks like Harlow's but also looks like someone's house, and the only open table has two old men sitting in it already, one is really nice and the other keeps giving us condescending looks.
So for whatever reason, probably to hang out with Paul, Katie leaves and I say something about why are we here when Hammer is at Baramundies and Ashley starts screaming at me, and I start screaming back, something like:
"WOULD YOU LET ME FINISH!!!"
"NO! NO! I WILL NEVER LET YOU FINISH!!!"
"LET ME FINISH"
"NEVER! I WLL NEVER LET YOU FINISH!!!"
Etc.
Also at this screaming point Ashley is shaking my shoulders as I am squeezing her mouth shout by holding her face by the chin/mouth.
Then we notice the second old guy (the condescending one) is laughing at at us so we stop and look at him, and he says something about how ASU speech people have a love hate relationship. Obviously this pisses us off so we start screaming/shaking/squeezing his face because he doesn't know us, or where we live. So he leaves and we notice we knocked lettuce/salad all over the nice old guy, so we apologize laugh and pick it off him.
Then Katie comes back says something about the old man we just assaulted being a jerk, and something about someone's erection or something like that.
current mood:  blah
current music: Momentum - Aimee Mann
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, August 1st, 2006
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10:27 pm - To Flush The Toilet You Pull The Thing UP.
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We live in a house!!
My room is blue and I can climb out my window and sit on the roof and smoke.
Also we moved for about 16 hours yesterday, if you were thinking it before it's been confirmed, we are in fact robots made of magic. And dreams.
SUCK ON THAT!!!!! AIAIAIIAIAIIAIAIIIIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAI!!!!
current mood: exhausted
current music: I've Been Thinking - Handsome Boy Modeling School
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, July 18th, 2006
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3:15 am - Turns Out I'm Awesome
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current mood:  the opposite of sleeping
current music: Call M- No Doubt, Garbage and The Distillers
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(comment on this)
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Monday, July 17th, 2006
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10:16 pm - A Negress Is A Negress Is A Negress
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I had a dream last night that I was dating Britney Spears, and I was really good with her baby (who by the way was really fat and always wore a sideways hat). So went to play mini golf, where I jumped out and scared kids for kicks or money.
current mood:  cleaning
current music: The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia-Vicki Lawrewnce
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(comment on this)
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Friday, July 14th, 2006
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2:55 am - El Chupa Cabre
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Did you know that NASCAR has its roots in the moonshine/rumrunning business? Neither did I untill I watched that History channel special on the mooonshine. Who knew you could learn so much by doing so little.
There's this new game I like to play it's called "Let's gain 20 pounds!" So far looks like I'm winning. I could do something about that by you know getting up before 4 PM and actually leaving the house for reasons other than smoking or going to Jewel to buy more Oreos, but you know whatevs.
Which is scarier, werewolf or hulked out steriod crazed olympian with a unibrow?
I think I have the soul of a dirty stinking hippie and the sesibility/praticality and taste of Nicole Richie.
Hey let's play a game, it's called "Does This Item Belong To Me or Joyce???"
(Sorry Joyce, you don't get to play this game)
+ Jergen's Naturally Smooth Shave Minimizing Lotion
+ Bed Head- HeadRush
+ Bed Head- AfterParty
+ Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (DVD)
+ Hardcore Lil' Hottie Hair Straightener
+ Lab Series - Ab Rescue Body Sculpting Gel
+ Burt's Bees - Wild Lettuce Toner
Answers will be posted at a later date.
In conclusion butt sex.
current mood:  Jammin'
current music: TIGA - Far From Home
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Saturday, June 10th, 2006
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8:30 am - LAGUNA BUST!
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I have a much better understanding of the show now.
current mood:  poop!
current music: Space Ho's - Danger Doom
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
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1:49 pm - Every Other Word Is "Uh-Huh, Yeah Okay"
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So I was thinking of making a Mother's Day card for my mom that said "Thanks for not getting an abortion." or possibly some other joke about birth control, but I have this feeling that she won't find this as hilarious as I do.
Any suggestions.
Additionally I have forever until my next class, I am bored.
Also I have been listening to "Say My Name" like non-stop, it's problematic.
current mood: bouncy
current music: D to the C - Say My Name
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Monday, May 1st, 2006
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3:04 am - There's A Sausage-Fest On My Wall
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I think Kelley Clarkson and I are soul mates.
current mood: bouncy
current music: Waiting for Tonight- J-Lizzle
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, April 26th, 2006
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3:20 am - I thought maybe this would give you a laugh at work
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THIS JUST IN!
JOYCE PICKS HER NOSE AND EATS IT!
current mood: awake
current music: Johnny Awesome and the Awesomes
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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Sunday, April 9th, 2006
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1:49 am - If I Were Betty White, I'd Turn Into An Eagle And Fly All The Way To America
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It's official I'm a lesbian.
And by lesbian I mean spinster.
And by spinster I mean I got in the fashion program.
And for Ms White:
I love you
I love you
I love you
Booyah
current mood:  naughty
current music: Wake UP Wake up - Hillary Duff
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(8 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, March 14th, 2006
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1:17 am - OOH Baby Baby! OOH Baby Baby!
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You know what I want right now, some motherfuckin Taco Bell. I found a good one too, that takes card in the drive through AND it's open till like 3 and 4 on the weekends.
Did I tell you I'm going to start writing some raps, journal? They will be hella tight, like Wonder Woman.
Also I was 20 minutes late to my Fashion Department Review! Twenty minutes! The review is 30 minutes!
If they gave out awards for being awesome they would be me one of those awards.
In other news Ray apparently bought his husband a car for his husband's birthday, a motherfuckin car, that is wierd. Whatever as much as I would like to be a pampered house wife, I don't think I could accept a car from someone, especially someone I was dating, you'd totally owe them for like ever.
current mood:  Chippy
current music: You Ain't Woman Enough to Take My Man - Loretta Lynn&Roseann
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(comment on this)
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Sunday, February 5th, 2006
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12:27 am
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I have this feeling that at this point in my life, if I had the money I'd be an alcoholic.
current mood:  they are happy together
current music: useless
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Thursday, February 2nd, 2006
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12:03 am - MK In The Study With The Revolver
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Sometimes I hate everything.
current mood:  regretfull
current music: Cold Roses- Ryan Adams and The Cardinals
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Wednesday, January 25th, 2006
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11:56 pm - FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!! FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!!
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Here I am in my jim-jams thinking about things I shouldn't be thinking about... nothing dirty just thinking about how I can stymie a merger.
Man I am awesome, and selfish, well more self interested. Whatever.
In local news I got a new phone since I destroyed my old one. It has the cutest wallpaper ever. I open my phone and BAM! Baby seal in my face.
current mood:  STYMIE!
current music: The Whispering Woods
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(comment on this)
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Saturday, January 21st, 2006
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3:00 am - PIZZA!PIZZA!PIZZA!
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I had a meetin with Jesus.
current mood: I stole a TV
current music: Feel Like Making Love
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(comment on this)
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Thursday, January 12th, 2006
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3:31 am - Turns out Papercut and I Have The Same Do
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I think Ray got homarried ("homarried" being my awesome new slang for a homo marriage) which is strange. Not because I have any real plans to get married, let alone any plans to marry Ray. Maybe I'm just THAT possessive. I don't know, I know there are still some feelings there, but anything working out there at all was always unlikely. For some reason I am just mean to whoever it is I am dating.
In other news I "brokedown" and saw "Brokeback Mountain" with the hoes. This is where I make the "Brokeback Mountain? More like Brokeback BORING!" joke. I was not impressed, probably due to all the hype or due to all the homos in the theatre. I was just so full of hate that I couldn't concentrate on the story.
Anyone know where I can get some hot pants? They're for my mom.
current mood:  Mis-Bea(Arthur)Havin'
current music: Bea Arthur
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Sunday, January 8th, 2006
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7:51 am - Oh, Herro!
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So the verdict is in guys, the music video we made the other night, is AMAZING!!!!!!
current mood: funky
current music: SHAKE YOUR RUMP
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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iamgwendolyn's journal